Anecdotes by medical practitioners

"A woman came in for a baby check with her 6-month-old and she had what looked like chocolate milk in the baby’s bottle. So he started explaining to her as kindly as he could that she shouldn’t be giving her baby chocolate milk. At which point she interrupts him and says, ‘Oh that isn’t chocolate milk. It’s coffee! He just loves it!”

"I had a patient come in for an STD check. She was very upset and continued to tell me that she only had one partner. Progressing through my assessment, she further divulged that even if he was sleeping with other people it shouldn’t matter ‘because he uses a condom every time and he makes sure to wash it thoroughly after every use’.”

"Had a lady who measured her baby’s temperature by pre-heating the oven and putting one hand in front of it while the other hand was on the baby’s forehead. She told the nurse her baby’s fever was about 250 degrees.”

"Lady has to have foot amputated and is given waiver forms to sign pre-op. Buddy asks if she needs time to think about it. She’s very nonchalant and doesn’t seem to care much what they do. He gets suspicious and probes a bit as to why she’s not more concerned. She says she gets that they have to operate and it’s OK because the foot will grow back.”

"I had a couple who had been trying to conceive for over two years. I asked all the usual questions, how often do you have sex, any previous pregnancy, etc etc. Something seemed off to me during the consult, so I continued to ask questions. Finally I asked if he ejaculated while inserted into the vagina. Both parties looked confused.Turns out the couple was not having insertional sex at all. I had to awkwardly explain to them how insertional sex works. Diagrams were required.”

"Patient comes in, she’s upset. She’s pregnant, and she doesn’t understand why. She’s on the pill. Upon talking to her at great length, I find out that she only takes the pills on the days that she is sexually active – no other time.”

"Patient comes in with her bf. They are indignant, as if somehow I could’ve prevented [the pregnancy]. The problem? Well, the pills were bothering the girl’s stomach, so, being a gallant bf, he decided to start taking them instead.”

“I was explaining the treatment to the husband of a patient about to be discharged. He kept nodding and agreeing with me, but I knew it was flying over his head. Turned out a fundamental problem was that I was describing the drugs as ‘tablets’ and he had no clue what those were.”

Reddit thread 

(via mmbahthevaccines)

If you won’t sing in the car with me when we drive, we can’t be friends

(via perks-of-being-chinese)

library-of-crazy-221b:

niknak79:

He’s tripping on acid

I tried to scroll past

library-of-crazy-221b:

niknak79:

He’s tripping on acid

I tried to scroll past

(via andrewbandguy)

lhomme-walk:

THE DEATH OF INDIE ~ a playlist of indie songs that got popular. does that indie is dying? fuck no! but it makes a great playlist (listen)

why’d you only call me when you’re high? - arctic monkeys ♡ lonely boy - the black keys ♡ last nite - the strokes ♡ help i’m alive - metric ♡ i will follow you into the dark - death cab for cutie ♡ the suburbs - arcade fire ♡ there is a light that never goes out - the smiths ♡ pumped up kicks - foster the people ♡ kids - mgmt ♡ sleepyhead - passion pit ♡ two weeks - grizzly bear ♡ dog days are over - florence and the machine ♡ horchata - vampire weekend ♡ sweater weather - the neighbourhood ♡ royals - lorde ♡ chocolate - the 1975

lhomme-walk:

THE DEATH OF INDIE ~ a playlist of indie songs that got popular. does that indie is dying? fuck no! but it makes a great playlist (listen)

why’d you only call me when you’re high? - arctic monkeys ♡ lonely boy - the black keys ♡ last nite - the strokes ♡ help i’m alive - metric ♡ i will follow you into the dark - death cab for cutie ♡ the suburbs - arcade fire ♡ there is a light that never goes out - the smiths ♡ pumped up kicks - foster the people ♡ kids - mgmt ♡ sleepyhead - passion pit ♡ two weeks - grizzly bear ♡ dog days are over - florence and the machine ♡ horchata - vampire weekend ♡ sweater weather - the neighbourhood ♡ royals - lorde ♡ chocolate - the 1975

(via andrewbandguy)

johannsebastianbitch:

:))
OHMYGOD this is so great god bless u

johannsebastianbitch:

:))

OHMYGOD this is so great god bless u

(via andrewvanwynperfect)

glutenfreewaffles:

remember when you put your glasses on for the first time and you realized you could see leaves on trees

(via freddiekowan)

The interests of an unknown being biding their time on the internet.

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